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How to talk to a parent about moving into assisted living

One of the most challenging experiences for adult children is watching their parents grapple with the effects of aging. Most seniors eventually need some type of physical or medical assistance. But changes are often gradual, and it’s just so hard to admit you can’t do everything for yourself anymore. No wonder your Mom or Dad is reluctant to talk about moving into assisted living.

Still, they know that you want what’s best for them. So don’t ignore their need just because they’re resistant.

Talk now

The longer you wait, the harder it will be to calmly discuss the advantages of assisted living. Waiting until your Mom’s situation is dire – or your Mom and Dad each need different types of care -- adds stress. And the pressure to make a quick decision could easily lead to a wrong choice. Besides, many of the best assisted living communities have waiting lists – you want to get on that as soon as possible so Mom can smoothly transition when it’s time.

Talking and planning in advance gives your parent more time to get used to the idea of moving and also to prepare for it. Deciding which belongings and personal treasures to take is an emotional experience.

Listen first

Mom is the center of this conversation, so draw her out. You might think her concerns are unfounded, but you can’t address them until you identify them. Why is she hesitant to move? Listen between the lines to hear what she isn’t saying. Ask about issues she may not bring up – it’s not unusual for seniors to worry about unknowns, such as making new friends or what daily living will be like.

Make a list together of all the things she likes best about her current home and life so she can look for those attributes as you research assisted living communities. Ultimately, the more she can make this decision for herself, the happier you both will be with her choice.

Take our Senior Living Assessment together

This practical online tool is a great conversation aid that can help your parent understand realistically if it’s time for assisted living.

Emphasize the positives

Today’s assisted living communities are designed to afford seniors maximum independence by providing the help they need to achieve it. Here at Winnwood Retirement, we offer an array of amenities and activities to help residents socialize and stay active in mind and body. The community is safe and secure. And the food is excellent, so don’t let Mom think otherwise!

Our comprehensive Assisted Living Guide is filled with useful information.

Explaining the difference between personal care and assisted living can also be a big help. Mom could stay where she is and receive certain home-care services, but she (or you) still have to manage her home. Assisted living offers more care and true retirement from the headaches and expense of household chores and maintenance. Mom may well discover that living at Winnwood is far more enjoyable!

Come see for yourselves!

You don’t have to do this on your own – we’re here to help. Frankly, your Mom may be more amenable to hearing about assisted living from someone other than you. Our professional staff has the compassion and experience to discuss both care needs and the overall benefits of an assisted living community.

Even better, we can give your Mom a personal tour -- one of the most valuable ways to debunk myths and give both of you a realistic vision of what assisted living is like. When you come to visit, you can ask all your questions, enjoy a tasty meal, and maybe get a chance to speak to a current resident. We’re ready whenever you are.



Meet Our Mayor, Wes Wehrenberg
Meet Our Mayor, Wes Wehrenberg
What is the difference between assisted living and independent living?
What is the difference between assisted living and independent living?